By: Teresa Cox Reading, RN and Dr. William H. Reading

No man is an island … mental wellness is not sustained in isolation. When we went through COVID, mental wellness was especially tough to maintain, due to the need to keep our distance from each other. It changed the very way we practiced medicine, did our jobs, conducted our friendships, hosted family gatherings, and sought help. Social distancing, or physical distancing, a term I prefer, was the norm. 

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Isolation is not in our best interest mentally, socially, physically, emotionally, or even practically speaking. And realistically, every day can be both a blessing and a challenge. Which one weighs heavier depends upon different perspectives involving our support systems.

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Who and what we have in our support system is key to how we cope, look at life, practice resiliency, solve problems, feel validated, and, more importantly, feel understood. Being understood is not just humanistic. It is an innate need of the basic human condition.

So, you might ask WHAT can be part of a mental health support system? Is it just people? And why do I need one? What are some positive aspects of a support system? Why do we need connection? Connection changes our perception. And connection to the right people, places, and things that contribute to the betterment of our lives is important. All of these can bring unique strengths and dynamics to mental wellness.

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There are many foundations that can create a support system for someone. Here are three of them:

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People 
Let’s start with the importance of people, including friends, family, coworkers, teachers, mental health professionals, and support group members in mental health support systems. 

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Sharing a moment with others can be a powerhouse of a boost for someone who needs a connection. Connections with your social support system can help with problems, solutions, and ideas. They can also contribute to abilities that help sustain you. Take stock of who these people are and appreciate their contribution. They may not even realize how much they help you, but it is important for you to recognize it. These people care for you, empathize with you, and support you. Reciprocation on your part is also important: Bend an ear, lend an ear.
 
Don’t forget to also count yourself in this support system. Practice self-care. And remember, self-care is not selfish. It’s imperative for your well-being and mental health. You can’t help others, or be a part of someone else’s social support system, if you don’t take care of yourself. You’ve heard the phrase, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” There are no truer words. Watch negative self-talk and the way in which you relate to yourself. There is value in being a friend to yourself as well. Also, if you feel you need additional help, it’s OK to ask for it. There are so many resources out there, both online and in person. Even apps these days can contribute. 

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Places
Your environment can be a support system. Your supportive environment is important. It is a place to relax and wind down. An uncluttered space can be extremely pleasant, beneficial, helpful in recovering from the day, and even productive. Take into account the importance of serving your senses in your environment: tactile, auditory, olfactory, visual, and even taste (that mint bowl). 

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Calm music, a fragrant candle, and incorporation of pleasant colors can make a wellness sanctuary. This is a support system that benefits you mentally, possibly even physically, if you add yoga or an alternative form of exercise. Don’t discount exercise as part of your foundation for a support system. It can do a body and mind good! 

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Things 
Physical items that improve our spaces can be placed in our environment for enhanced mental wellness. They can be things we embrace, boost our senses, relax us, or create feelings and emotions that make us feel happy, supported, and satisfied. They don’t need to be expensive. Sometimes, the simpler things can be the most satisfying. A musical instrument or a book can fit the bill. While a pet is more like a family member, it, too, can be a thing of importance, beauty, company, and love. 

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While this next item can also be included in “Places,” I am listing it under “Things.” A vacation is something that can be of great benefit to us. It does not need to be in an expensive hotel or a faraway location. A simple vacation with a change of scenery can be of value in getting away from the norm of things. 

Keeping the things that you count on, like transportation, your home, and other things you rely on, there for you, and in good condition, counts too. Have your things in order. That lends support. But be careful of having too many things, things that distract you in the wrong way, things that weigh you down, and things that do more harm than good. Life is a balance. 

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In conclusion, be aware of who, what, and where you are in the process of building your support systems. We all need them. We all need understanding. We all need connection.